Too often parents want to stop in at their children’s prom to snap a picture.   No matter the justification, the function is not for the parent, it’s only for the young adult.

Parents should not have to worry about their children at the formal since each child has been given all the skills necessary to conduct himself as a young adult.  If any student acts like a child at the event, there are plenty of chaperones to correct the behavior.   Even the chaperones allow the kids to be adults.  As chaperones, we welcome the kids, keep a watchful eye, but for the most part, the evening is for the kids, not us.  We keep our respectful distance.

As a teacher in my children’s school, I removed myself from all their social events.  I believed, correctly I might add, that they did not want their mother at their events.  I did chaperone, but not for their proms.  I did visit my students at proms, as they’d asked me to do, but not during my kids’ formals.  I believed my son and daughter needed their personal experiences to prepare for the future.    Though my children never discussed it, I know they appreciated that Mom wasn’t there in the teacher, or mom capacity.

So, what to do?  Take pictures before prom and ask your child to take pictures for you to see during the prom.  If your child doesn’t bring pictures home, it may be he had too much fun to worry about pictures, or she simply wanted the evening to be her own.

Here’s an option. Make prom night a special night for yourself.  Go to dinner, have a good time with your friends.  This night is preparing your child for a life without you and it should also be preparing you for a life when your child leaves the nest.